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ROTKINEN
THE GENERATOR NEXT DOOR COUGHS to life at 6:47 a.m. Iāve been awake since 4:12, mind circling back to places I donāt want it to go.
A holding room. Polished cuffs. Silk against my eyes.
This Sunday morning is mine. Turmeric tea, silence, my nails, and nobody elseās emergency.
While the mask dries, I inspect last nightās work. Nude pink, neat, filed into cute squares. The left thumb has a tiny smudge near the cuticle that nobody but me would notice.
I notice. So, I fix it.
Some women do this for attention. I do this for the mirror. For the version of myself I constructed from rubble.
Schoolboy.
I meant it when I said it.
At work, on my social media pages where I post my Do Better documentaries and mini-docs, even in the column I earned in the nationās favorite newspaper where every quarter I write about the systems eating at societyāObinna Okwuluoka is so young for what he does.
The people I usually investigate are older. Men and women with decades behind them. Which makes him unsettling. If heās this powerful at his age, what kind of man will he be at fifty?
And, honestly, heās not as tall as I expected. Iām five-eleven barefoot and Iāve never once bought flat shoes on purposeāso I spend most of my life looking down at grown men and watching them hate it. From his photos I assumed heād be the exception, that heād tower. Heās say⦠six-one or six-two, and in my heels Iād have half-inch on him.
I make my tea and carry it to the small table by the window.
After my release, I should have called someone. Thatās what normal people doācall a friend, vent, get told theyāre overreacting. But the last friend I had who knew about my uncle, who held me when the betting app notifications stopped and the eviction notices started, she moved to Canada three years ago. We mostly text on birthdays now.
I open WhatsApp. Tap my uncleās name.
He picks up when Iām almost giving up.
āRotkinen.ā His face fills the screen. Heās in his security uniformāthe navy blue one with the estate logo on the breast pocket. Behind him, I can see the gate of whatever Ajah mansion heās guarding today.
āGood morning, sir.ā I tilt the phone so he canāt see the remnants of the mask on my hairline. He teases me when he catches it, and we banter until he starts yawning.
āWhatās for breakfast today?ā I ask. āCome and inspire me.ā
His pause tells me he knows what Iām indirectly asking. He shifts the phone and I catch a flash of his collarbone through the uniform collar. Keener than last month.
āGarri and groundnut,ā he says.
āHaba, Uncle Cephas. That one is exam week food now. Serious talk uncle, ngha ma seme chinchin ne?ā[1]
āIt is what I have I will eat. mangātan a pin nyok ngan kat.ā[2]
Itās at the tip of my tongue to ask, are you gambling again? But I donāt, because heāll deny it, and then Iāll push, and then heāll do that thing where his eyes go flat and distant like Iām talking to a wall, and then Iāll feel like Iām twelve againāwatching daddy do the same thing before he disappeared into a betting shop in Pankshin and didnāt come home for three days.
So, I say, āIāll send you something to buy food. Real food.ā
āEhn⦠keep your money.ā
āEhn, send it back to me if you know my account number nau.ā
His lips curve into a small smile. āThank you. Small mummy.ā
He says it like an accusation. Like mummy wasnāt the one who held him together after his wife left. Like she didnāt send him money every month, scraping it from a teacherās salary that barely covered our own rent.
āNgha rot ha[3].ā I end the call before my throat can do anything stupid.
I send him enough to eat for the rest of the month. Thatās if he doesnāt feed it to whatever betting app has its teeth in him.
The thing about loving someone who gambles is that you become a gambler too. Every transfer, youāre placing a bet. Maybe this time heāll use it for food. Maybe this time he wonāt sit in a corner shop watching football scores. You know the odds. You play anyway.
Thatās why Iām investigating a man whose empire runs on those odds. Obinna Bernard Okwuluoka. The man who kidnaps a journalist and uses silk. Whose company plasters every danfo, every billboard, every football jersey from Epe to Satellite Town. The company that probably has my uncleās fingerprints somewhere in its user data. He funds youth programs and community outreach under CSR[4], though Iād bet my next monthās salary he has no idea what half his CSR team actually does to make the company look good.
That man sat across from me and told me my investigation was āinconvenient.ā
If he thought silk blindfolds and metal cuffs would scare me off, he miscalculated.
Iām scared. Iām also furious.
The fury is stronger.
I wash my mug. Dry it. Place it handle-right in the cabinet. Wipe the counter and fold the towel into thirds.
Iāve got work to do.
THE STUDIO IS A GHOST TOWN on Sundays.
Fluorescent lights reveal empty desks, the faint smell of Francisās microwaved jollof from Friday lingers in the break room. I come in because I can think here. The apartment is for ritual. The studio is for war.
Iām prepping Fridayās segmentāan education funding piece thatās solid but wonāt set anything on fireāwhen Eucharia appears.
My editor moves like the weather. You donāt hear her coming. You just feel the atmospheric pressure change, and then sheās there, dropping a brown envelope on your desk like itās a summons.
āRotkinen.ā
āHi Eucharia.ā
She taps the envelope. Her acrylic nails are perfectāFrench tips with stones, buffed smooth. Theyāre better than mine. I try not to stare.
āPuntPlay,ā she says. āThe mini-doc your followers are raving about.ā
Although my pulse jumps, my face stays neutral.
āWhat about it?ā
āThe higher-ups are interested. Thereās a new angle.ā She pulls a chair, sits on it backwardāEucharia does things like that, sits on chairs backward, perches on desks, leans against walls at angles that shouldnāt be comfortable. āObinna Okwuluoka. Born and mostly raised in Atlanta, Georgia, USA. Founder. CEO. Old money fatherāthe Okwuluokas of Ekwulobia. Political connections reaching into Aso Rock. The man is untouchable.ā
She slides a photo out of the envelope.
I already know what he looks like. Iāve been in a room with him. He removed a silk blindfold from my face with steady, long fingers. I know what he smells like. His charcoal shirt, the understated cufflinks.
But I look at the photo anyway.
Dark suit, no tie, glass with amber liquid in his hand. Standing next to someone shorter, as he often must. Square jaw. Calculating eyes pulling me in.
I break the connection by looking at Eucharia.
āAnd?ā I say.
āThere are whispers. Match-fixing in the Finnish leagueāhis club plays there. If we crack this, Rot, we go international. Not social media international. Iām talking network pickup. CNN. BBC.ā
Sheās watching me with those editor eyes. The ones that can tell if youāre hungry enough.
I am hungry.
But not for the reasons she thinks.
I almost tell her by almost saying: Iāve already met him. He kidnapped me weeks ago. He sat across from me and told me to back off. I told him Iād been investigating systems my entire career, and then he let me go. Uncuffed me himself. Told me heād be watching.
I donāt say any of that.
Because saying it would involve me explaining why I didnāt report it. Explaining why Iām still investigating instead of filing charges. Explaining the part where he released me and I walked out confused instead of triumphant. Explaining why Iāve spent two weeks trying to put Obinna Okwuluoka in a category and failing every time.
āWhen do I start?ā I say instead.
āYou already have.ā She stands, flips the chair back around. āFileās yours. Donāt let me down.ā
She leaves the way she came.
I open the envelope. Financial summaries. Corporate structure. A list of subsidiaries Iāll need to cross-reference. A printed screenshot of an online forum where someone anonymous claims PuntPlayās Finnish league results are āstatistically impossible.ā
I photograph everything. Upload to my encrypted drive. Label the folder: O. Okwuluoka.
Then I stare at his photo.
Iāve seen most of this file alreadyāI pulled them before the kidnapping. But now I know things the file doesnāt capture. The exact shade of his eyes up closeādarker than they photograph, calculating in a way that feels personal rather than professional. I know his voice doesnāt match his lanky stature. Deeper, more resonant, fills a room without being raised. I know his hands are carefulā
Iām scared of what you represent.
Those were his words. Amongst other things.
He admitted he was scared. Of me.
And then he let me go.
Rich. Connected. Untouchable.
Weāll see.
I work for two more hours. Cross-referencing company registrations. Mapping the corporate structureāPuntPlay sits under Midas Venture Capital, which sits under Okwuluoka Holdings, which itself nests under three layers of offshore entities. Clean on the surface, but those structures cost serious money to maintain. Something is in there.
The Finnish league connection is thin but interesting. PuntPlay sponsors FC Kouvola, a third-division club. The forum post claims their last eight home results defied every predictive model. Could be luck. Could be a small club on a run. Could be worth pulling until it unravels.
I make notes in shorthandāa habit from Jos. I developed it in school while communal violence crackled at the edges of the city. It looks like Ngas script had a child with algebra. If someone ever takes my notes, they shouldnāt be able to make sense of a single line.
I leave the studio at half five, arrive home before seven, then decide to take a walk that doubles as a mini grocery restock.
On my way back, the hairs at my nape lift.
Someone is watching me.
Is it his people? Is he tracking me still? He said heād be watching my workādoes that mean watching me?
I keep walking. Donāt turn around. I learned a long time ago that turning around gives them power. I scan casually. Peripheral vision. Reflections in shop windows.
Thereās a man walking thirty meters behind me. Baseball cap, dark shirt.
Could be Obinnaās security. Could be a guy Iāve been ignoring. Could be just a man on a regular Sunday evening walk.
I cross the street. Pause at Mama Sidiās shop, pretend to look at the sachets of detergent hanging like bunting across the front. Use the reflection in the glass cabinet to scan behind me.
The man in the cap is gone. Or⦠was he never there? Maybe he turned a corner. Wait, is he standing somewhere I canāt see, waiting for me to start walking again?
Gosh, Iām being paranoid.
Except I was kidnapped two weeks ago, so maybe itās not paranoia. Before, Iād felt it sometimesāthe vigilance that comes with being a woman alone in Lagos, with having survived what I survived in Benin City.
My therapistāthe one I saw for four sessions before I decided I was fineācalled it hypervigilance. Said it was my nervous system staying ready for a threat that already passed.
Iām not breakable. I broke already. Whatās left is the version that doesnāt break.
But my hand is shaking when I reach my door, and it takes me two tries to fit the key.
I go inside. Lock the bottom. Lock the top. Slide the bolt.
I stand in my dark apartment with my back against the door and breathe. My heart is going crazy. Auditioning for a heart attack.
Count.
Count!
Four in. Hold for seven. Out for eight.
After putting the groceries away, I prepare my bathāboiling water, pouring it into the tub until itās too hot, the way I like it. Then I sink in until the water touches my collarbones and close my eyes.
Too late, I realize I should have brought my phone for music, because the water is too quiet. And in quiet, my mind wanders.
Breathe.
One. Two. Threeā
A holding room. Silk against my eyes. His footsteps approaching. The click of the chair as he sat across from me. His voice: āMiss Nentawe.ā
No. Not that. Further back.
A hand on my wrist. A boyās hand, but strong. The sweet chemical scent that was all shades of wrong. A tablet dissolving under my tongue that I didnāt put there. The room tilting. The ceiling fan spinning slower and slower andā
I surface abruptly, water going everywhere. My elbow cracks against the edge of the tub and pain shoots up to my shoulder. Iām gasping. The bathroom is fogged. I get out of the tub. The mirror above the sink is a white blank. Why canāt I find myself in it?
Ohā¦
āIām fine.ā My voice bounces off the tiles. Itās a thin, sorry voice. Not the voice that told Obinna Okwuluoka Iād been investigating systems my entire career, that I wasnāt afraid of him, that men who made him look like a schoolboy had sat across from me before.
āI moved on.ā
I pull the bath plug. The water drains.
āIām fine. Iām fine. Iām fine,ā I mutter as I stand, wrap myself in a towel, avoiding the mirror.
My phone screams in the silence. My heart jumps.
I grab it.
Whew⦠my aunt.
āAunty Paddy.ā
āRotki!ā Her warm, familiar voice melts my heart. āYouāve finally picked! Iāve been calling, you no dey answer.ā
āIt is work,ā I say, steadying my breathing by placing a hand to my tummy. āYou know how it is.ā
āWork, work, work,ā she clicks her tongue. āIs it that work thatāll carry you when you fall sick? Kai. We have not seen your face since all these days fa. How you dey?ā
I lean against the wall, slide down slowly until Iām sitting on the edge of the bed.
āIām fine, Aunty.ā
āFine ke?ā she scoffs. āDonāt tell me that one. Even your voice sef is somehow. You that I know.ā
I swallow. āIām just tired. Long day.ā
āHmm.ā We stay silent for a while before she asks softly. āAre you eating well at all?ā
āYes.ā
āAre you sleeping?ā
I hesitate, smiling wanly. āI try.ā
āRotkinenā¦ā She says my full name the way only she does, drawing it out like a prayer. āYou this girl. You too dey carry everybody matter for head. You think say you strong pass everybody? Talk true, how you dey?ā
I let out a small breath. āAunty Paddy Iām fine. For real.ā
āEhen. You will say you are fine nau.ā Another click of her tongue. āCome and stay with us small. Even if itās one weekend. Come. Iāll make tuwo for you. Youāll relax your body. Laugh small. Na this same Lagos we dey o.ā
I nod even though she canāt see me. āOkay. Iāll come.ā
āWhen?ā
āSoon.ā
āSoon when? Donāt tell me soon-soon. Give me a day. If not, I will come and carry you myself.ā
āAuntyāā I laugh softly.
āIām serious. You think I canāt enter keke and find you?ā
āYou can.ā
āExactly.ā Her tone softens. āTake care of yourself, okay? And donāt forget to pray. You are doing well, okay?ā
āOkay.ā
āGood girl.ā She pauses, before adding: āWe are here. Youāre not alone, eh?ā
I exhale. Silent tears stream down my cheeks. āI know.ā
āOkay. Go and rest. I will see you soon kwo?ā
āYes, Aunty. Soon.ā
I pull on my nightgown. Check the front doorāall three locks. Check the windows. Check the back door to the small balcony I never use.
Everything secured. Everything in its place.
I get into bed, slippers left perpendicular because thatās just how they go. Set my alarm for 5:30 a.m. Connect my phone to charge.
The room is dark. The air is still. My body wonāt settle. I stare at the ceiling crack.
My mind, initially occupied with scheduling a visit to Aunty Paddy and the Ngas Womenās Association, soon drift towards the holding room. The chair. The soft, expensive silk pressing against my eyelids. I couldnāt see anything, but I could hear everythingāhis unhurried footsteps, the creak of leather as he sat, the feel of his eyes on me.
My body remembers the way my pulse jumped when he spoke. The way my skin prickled when his footsteps came closer. The way I sat straighter in that chair, hyperaware of every inch of myself, because I couldnāt see him but I knewāhe was seeing me.
āMiss Nentawe.ā
I reflexively press my thighs together, remembering the richness of his voice.
Sleep.
But the memory keeps coming. The zip tiesānot too tight, tight enough. The vulnerability of being bound, being blind, being completely at someoneās mercy. My senses on high alert.
I turn onto my side. Then my back. Then my side again.
His hands were careful when he removed the blindfoldā
Stop. Stop. Stop.
But my hand has already moved. It is resting on my stomach, over the thin silk of my nightgown.
Iām just finding a comfortable position. Iām notā
His voice: āIām scared of what you represent.ā
My fingers drift lower.
No. This is insane. He kidnapped me. Threatened my career. Heās the man whose company is probably bleeding my uncle dry, whose empire was built on the desperation of people like my father. I want to destroy him.
My hand slips under the fabric anyway, my mind going somewhere I have no business letting it go.
The first touch is electric. Iām swollen, sensitive, and the brush of my fingertips sends a jolt through me that makes my hips lift off the mattress. Iām wet. Dripping. And I hate itāhate my body for this, hate the memory for lodging itself somewhere primal and unreasonable.
But I donāt stop.
I circle slowly, the way Iāve done countless times before. Building sensation using pressure in measured increments, relying on a method Iāve mastered to give myself what I need when no one else can be trusted to.
In my head, itās his voice edging me on.
āMiss Nentawe.ā
āIām used to people being reasonable.ā That infuriating certainty.
āIāll be watching your work with interest.ā
I slide two fingers inside myself and my breath catches. Iām thinking about his hands nowāthe ones that removed the blindfold, the ones that held the polished cuffs. What would they do if they touched me? Would they be gentle like this? Unhurried? Would he take his time the way he took his time in that holding room, making me wait, making me wonder?
These thought⦠I donāt know where theyāre coming from, but theyāre doing the trick tonight.
I press my free hand against myself and abandon caution. The measured pace I began with unravels, replaced by urgency. Need takes over, stripping away grace until all that remains is the relentless pursuit of release.
His eyes, cold and calculating across that table. Looking at me like Iām playing with fire. Only for him to admit he was scaredāof me, of what I represent. Scared ofā
āHmm⦠hmmmā¦ā
My back arches off the bed, thighs clenching around my hand. The sounds leaving my mouth lives somewhere between a gasp and a moan, his name bitten off before it fully forms. Orgasm tears through me in wavesāyes, yesāI ride it with my eyes squeezed shut, seeing nothing but silk, shadow and smirking lips.
When it ends, I lie there. Breathing. Wet fingers resting against my thigh.
Did I just have the best orgasm in months thinking about the subject of my investigation? What is wrong with me?
This isnāt attraction. This is trauma response. This is my wires getting crossed somewhere between terror and arousal because my brain doesnāt know the difference between the two. My therapist would have something clinical to say about it. Threat and desire activated overlapping neural pathways. Something like that.
But here, in the dark, with the evidence of my betrayal sticky between my thighs, the clinical explanation doesnāt help.
I want to destroy Obinna Okwuluoka. I also wantā
No. I donāt want anything. This was a release. A physical necessity. It means nothing.
I get up. Wash my hands and the rest of myself.
When I finally sleep, I dream about dark eyes and a man who peeled silk from my face.
I wake up angrier than when I went to bed.
Good.
Anger is fuel. Anger gets things done.
[1] Ngas for what are you eating today?
[2] Ngas for Stop stressing me.
[3] Ngas for I love you.
[4] Corporate Social Responsibility
40+ Chapters to goā¦
Releases September 30, 2026.


